I wear my heart on my sleeve I guess.

It's funny how things change. This post has the potential to sound pathetic, but i promise that is not in my intentions.

All through out my childhood, I've never been the girl that guys wanted. I've never been the one guys look at or have crushes on. And don't get me wrong Im totally fine with that. This isn't self pity. Just an observation. But now that I've graduated. It's just different. I actually have options. Guys are interested in me. It's just weird. Flattering, but weird.

 I don't really know how to act now. Is it okay to just date people when they ask you. To hang out with guys you don't really know that well. At first I thought it was a shady thing, but then since you don't really go to high school with them, how else are you going to get to know them? Thats how you meet people right?

Just something thats been on my mind. 

A few guys have showed interest in me the past week or two. To be honest, I'm just not really feeling it. I think my last boyfriend was such a great guy, I have really high expectations now. Which isnt necessarily bad, but it makes it hard for me to give anyone a chance. 

I think I'm also afraid of commitment. I'm afraid of taking risks, putting my heart out there. My last relationship was two years. and we were really intimate. Not physically, but just really close and really serious. I just can't picture myself being like that with anyone in a long time. I mean I'd love to. But when I think of being like that with anyone I know now, it just doesnt seem possible.

ugh

It's 3:52 am. 

No no no, this is not me getting home from a crazy party or going to bed at this hour. This is me waking up to go to work at 4:30 am. I went to bed at about 10 and probably didn't actually fall asleep until.. I don't know maybe 1230?    ..Baaahh I'm sleepy.

I better make good tips.

But hey I had a dream about a cute boy in my Us History class. I think we ditched class together..thats cute huh blog?

this is my first.

So I'm not sure how long I'll keep this up. But let's just see how it goes. I've never been one to keep a journal or post long Myspace bulletins about my day. I've never really had a way with words like some do. But hey I keep hearing this phrase, maybe you've heard of it, "Practice makes perfect." Anyone?

Today I went for a jog. Now you must understand, I never just go for a jog. NEVER. I just woke up and thought to myself, "Good morning Kate, hey how bout we put on our running shoes and enjoy life by exercising our legs??" So we did. Or I did. It started off pretty exhilarating. And soon went  downhill.  [Not literally, but I wish.] I decided that I love my neighborhood, the houses are so old and cute. I ran for about 3 minutes and walked the other 20 or so. Well I ran the last stretch but I just ended up collapsing on my front lawn. I laid there for about 10 minutes just staring at the sky trying to catch my breath, watching my neighbors drive by staring in confusion. I just waved with an out of breath, slightly disgusted smile.

Another thing, why do people leave their keys under their doormats? I mean, If I was a burglar that would for sure be the first place I'd look. Just saying.

Thats basically my day so far. Now I'm gonna go shower, maybe do some homework that's due in an hour. Maybe.

See I told you this wouldn't be to interesting. Nothing profound or new. Just expressions of my day. See ya suckers.